Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Star

“I wish that dad would come back”

Yet another loud whisper woke me up from my deep slumber, adding a sudden pang of ache to my pulsing head. It was rather dark still, with a distant glimmer from the others like little glass beads being showered with astonishing glare of rays. I thought of that hopeful whisper and shut my eyes hard. Maybe I was hoping that there was something I could do about it, maybe I was merely trying in vain to attain more rest. I did not know what I wanted. But I knew everything seemed impossible just as every other quaint murmur- sometimes muffled while others quite piercing- would always distract me from getting more sleep. I rolled over on my resting point and drifted away in my train of thoughts.

Born 7 years ago in Magellan, I have grown up listening to angry pleas and mournful hopes, I was scared and puzzled so I used to scream at night thus waking everyone in the vicinity. They stared at me when I roamed around the town and they mocked my answer when I told them about the voices. Mummy tried to take it all in and raise me up as a mother and father would but I think it got too much for her so she packed up our things and told me that we are going on a visit to Big Momma’s house in Persei. I leaped with joy as we have never gone anywhere but being gone was what she did. She wafted away from me like a puff of smoke as we reached Persei and taking me into her stride, the fiercely wilful Big Momma who was mummy’s closest kith said that I should ignore all those voices, that they were all just inside my head. She told me to withstand the sounds and endure them like a man despite my young age because I am no ordinary kid. I knew I had to fit in and build myself again so I did as I was told. Plainly said, we never talked about it anymore.

I would have never thought of sharing my dreams and fears with anyone here. I just wanted to be like everyone else, just like the hundreds of us in this quiet little city of lights because if you’re different, you stick out like a sore thumb. So I went on with life and played little games with all the others and ignoring the voices I hear as I hopscotch just to batter my limbs, to burst with energy or to explode in anger from time to time. I had to dominate to rise from a lonely spot into a force to be reckoned with. It is never easy to do that but we all try to.

As years passed by, I have grown with a healthy glow about me and I shine like an imaginary pearl glazed with lucent gold. I have knocked out everyone else from the equation to be the most powerful in town for I stole the limelight only for myself. Alas, the voices kept getting louder and more defined as I got stronger. It messed up my head sometimes and I threw some tantrums to stop them but all I get is little ‘ooohsss’ and ‘aaahhhss’ of wonder. Those voices never gave up and continuously coo their songs of yearning without fail. Then, one day, it came: a peculiar revelation as the voices slowly subsided into nothing.

I grew hollow inside and felt lonelier than I ever did before. My spirit dimmed and nothing seemed able to revive it, not even the longest nap I ever had in my life. I suffered in the unfamiliar tranquillity though that was all I wished for all my life. Unable to fathom this, I brought myself to Big Momma’s door. She still beamed with radiance even after all these years. Sensing my distraught manner, she cajoled me in and asked of my wellbeing. I have lost my ability to show weakness so I said in a stiff voice,

“I have not been listening to them. I thought I would be happy but it disturbs me that they don’t. Is there something wrong with me?”

She stood still and let out a heavy sigh, as if heaving out a burden contained in her chest. Her eyes flickered with a malicious secret that receded that sigh, as if it evoked a certain memory that just cornered itself into her mind. She opened her mouth then hesitated to say something.

“You should tell me, Big Momma,” my voice finding a sympathetic tone.

“You’re different, Cygnus. You’re gifted for you have been chosen among all of us to be the Wish. It is their wishes that make you strong and hopeful because with their hopes, you build yours. You see that blue spot there? That is your wishing point where all your wishes come from,”

“But why have they stopped wishing?”

“I do fear that this day will come, when they would give up on hope and become non-believers. When love becomes a stranger and wrath governs for when this happens, they will destroy each other. It is now time for a reminder and it requires a huge sacrifice,”

Big Momma’s eyes were now heavy with grimness. I threw a glance at the blue spot that I have never bothered about before and thought about how I have affected these people.

“I will do it, Big Momma. I will…”

I kissed her cheek and stormed off. She was shouting my name but I was too fast for her. I sped off towards the end of Persei and as I got there, I was quivering with zest. I looked out towards that blue spot that seemed a million miles away and remembered all the prayers I have feigned not to hear before. As all of them came rushing into my mind, I spread out my hands and felt my heart thumping with a million beats of promises. A surge of energy centred on all those hopes and I gloried in all of them. I smiled in the glory and shone into a blinding brightness that shook Persei off her feet. I dazzled in the knowledge that my existence was not in vain, that I was not a freak but I am a saviour.

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“You’re watching CNN War Minutes and you’re here with Randy Miller. Reports have been cited of a possibility that the gleaming ray of light seen on the sky last night for about 5 minutes everywhere around the world was a supernova that erupted in the Chi Persei Galaxy located a billion miles from the Earth. This phenomenon is dubbed as Nova Cygni and convinced that this is a miracle for it is rare occurrence to be seen by the naked eyes, many were found dumping their weapons and flooding mosques, churches and synagogues instead to seek solace while hoping for the world to be a better place. This seems like a sign for a new beginning after years of animosity and let us all hope that hope never fades.”

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